perseverance is a verb

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The work of creating is more than just the act. All the preparation. . . the shutting out of the world. . . the opening up of oneself. . .  the protecting of oneself. . . the gathering, oh I love the gathering. . . the things that make you tick tock toward the finished piece. . . I love all these moving parts. Such hard work and so satisfyingly adventurous.

There seems to be an endless learning curve where impatience builds, but as I work through this, accepting instead of fighting it. . . I’m finding joy in putting myself out there as an unfinished product. I simply will never be fully formed, because I am a work in progress.  . .always. This is ok. This is wonderfully freeing knowledge.

So I will press forward, casting my net wide, painting with courage and standing firm in my identity.IMG_4145

**Photos of my new studio thanks to my kind husband(and many generous friends) who gave so much of himself to make it a reality :)

through the ocean of doubt

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Pull the curtain back on any one painting and you are sure to witness the sea of doubt pounding against the shores of my creativity.  Doubt and fear that were sometimes cautiously, sometimes brazenly waded, swam and forged through.  

So many thoughts tumble about my mind throughout the course of a painting that I find it necessary to subdue them with sound. Be it music, a book on tape, a fine british crime drama or science radio. . . all fit the bill of overcoming the odds stacking against my will when I pick up the brush.  

Occasionally, however, I welcome the doubt, for it pushes arrogance aside, and realigns my nature to remain forever a student, to learn from each piece, not simply be satisfied with the comfortable. 

It seems rather vital to move through the fear rather than wish it away. Like any difficult trial in life, without it we would be spineless, with it we are more than conquerors.

**Painting Target, by me. Prints available here